I didn't have an answer.
I left that night. We haven't spoken since.
That was two months ago.
I dropped out of school. Moved back in with my mom. Started therapy twice a week. The nightmares are getting better. Slowly.
Mom apologized. Said she thought she was protecting me by keeping him away. She didn't know he'd looked for her. Didn't know he would have stayed.
"He deserved to know," I told her. "I deserved to know."
"You're right. I was young and scared and I made the wrong choice."
Last week, a letter arrived. No return address, but I recognized the handwriting from birthday cards he'd given me.